Friday, June 3, 2016

Dealing With Rejection

by Dione Kuraoka, aka "The Texan"

Rejection. It sucks.
It sucks real bad. 

It doesn't matter if it is in your career or in your personal life, getting rejected feels like a sucker punch to the gut. 

In the entertainment business it happens a lot, so one might assume that you just get used to it. I think it does get easier but every so often you get a "no" that stings you mighty bad. 

I have had my fair share of breakups and rejections and I have decided to share some tips on how I "get over" the "no".

1. CRY. Hard. Let the ugly cry take over and don't judge it. Let your face contort as if you are going through an exorcism. Cry until the dry heaving becomes painful. Mourn the "what could have been".

2. Get mad. Yell. I like to yell in my car because it is the best place to let your crazy out. Some of my favorite things to yell are "why not me!!!", "you will regret this!", and " THIS IS SPARTA!" Sometimes just yelling guttural noises help. 

3. Treat yo self. Get some ice cream. Take a bubble bath. Go for a nice walk. Whatever it is, do something just for you.

4. Tell yourself that you don't care about this little bump. It's not going to get you down! Focus on all the amazing things in your life. Think of all the cool stuff you have to be thankful for. This rejection don't mean sh$$$!!

5. Move on! As they say, fake it TIL you make it. Eventually the hurting and heartbreak will stop and you will be looking on the sunny side again!

..... Until it happens again. Then just repeat steps 1-5. ;)
Remember you are fierce and you will get through it!

Thursday, May 19, 2016

5 Animals More Interesting Than Your Trump Post

By Katie Elsaesser, aka "The Tall"

It's election season, so of course everyone is drywalling their social media with their politics. Personally, I like my politics like I like my step-Grandma, for special occasions and filled with Catholic guilt.

On nights when I'm procrastinating from either writing or sleeping, I dig through milieu of politically charged-open-maw shout-fests and come across a glorious animal video that restores all my faith in the world.

So may I present to you, a better alternative than your very detailed comparison of Trump to Hitler:

1) A Duck Snoring. 

I mean, were you AWARE that ducks snored? It had never crossed my mind, but now I am OVERJOYED that I know this fact!

2) A FRIGGIN Puppy Inside of a FRIGGIN Watermelon!

Like... WHAT!? Come the fuck onnnnnn dude!

3) Drop the Bass Bull Dog

It's late, you're tired, but not enough to fall asleep. Then you come across this gem and realized there was a niche music market that you haven't ever explored yet! SOMEONE GET ME A PUPPY STAT!

4) The Existence Of This Disturbing Tool

Someone legitimately invented this to keep us from reading the racist Facebook post from your Aunt in Cleveland. 

5) This Elephant is My Spirit Animal

If that doesn't make you the happiest, than I can not save your soul. And for that I am sorry.

If you have any amazing animal videos/gifs/photos send them our way, I would MUCH rather see those filling up my feed!

Happy Friday all!
~The Tall

Friday, May 13, 2016

Duchess Riot is Obsessed With Buffalo Cauliflower

by Lauren Howard Hayes, aka "The Pageant Queen"

It’s true. And we aren’t ashamed.

Every Wednesday, we have rehearsal at ACME Comedy Noho theater. Directly after rehearsal, we walk to The Eclectic on Lankershim Blvd to have our weekly business meeting. We flip to the  Happy Hour menu and there it is: BUFFALO STYLE CRISPY CAULIFLOWER.
Photo by Craig H.

For $7 you get a generous serving of “spicy, deep fried, blue cheese dipping sauce (and) celery sticks”. That glorious description was copy and pasted from their Happy Hour Snack Menu.
We usually order two or three orders (depending on how much we want to emotionally eat that week). The repeat Buffalo Cauliflower offenders are myself, Chelsey, and Erin and we happily dole it out to the other Duchesses family style, because we’re family.
This Buffalo Cauliflower is usually accompanied by a dirty martini or a glass of Chardonnay.
Buffalo Cauliflower is for when we want to trick ourselves into thinking we’re actually eating healthy. We justify that it’s a vegetable, are are quick to deny the deep fried truth.
I personally am dying to take the Duchesses to the other two restaurants I love to get Buffalo Cauliflower:

Mohawk Bend - Echo Park

This hipster restaurant’s dish is very popular. It’s served with vegan blue cheese dressing and celery sticks. The servers secretly roll their eyes at you if you order it because everyone orders  it.
Photo by Sarah G. on Yelp

Public School 213 - Downtown LA

I get it here for when I hate myself. These bad boys aren’t just lightly fried, they are coated with breading and submerged into a popping fryer of bubbling oil and fat. They’re served with a side of buffalo sauce, blue cheese aioli, celery and carrot sticks. But if you know me, I barely touch that aioli garbage because #mayonnaise.
Photo by Andrea T. on Yelp

So there it is. Our Buffalo Cauliflower secret is out. If you’ve had this dish anywhere else, PLEASE tell us where you've had it so we can seek it out and indulge ourselves.
Ironic Side Note: I wrote this blog whilst dealing with food poisoning. Go me.